America cannot fix Africa, but Americans can.

A year ago this month I was serving in Ethiopia as a visitor, learner, and teacher at a Christian mission and school in a small rural community. I served along with about 15 other students from my university, and our time there was no less than precious. The children we served and played with were beautiful, hilarious, mischievous, busy, and successful; I know that our time there empowered some children to take a glimpse at their potential future as leaders for their country and community.

One of our Ethiopian friends from that very community, who is now one of three students from that community attending our university, posted this video on facebook:


After I watched the video, my wheels began spinning, as they often do. I am thinking about how the United States in general interacts with African nations, about how Christians interact with African nations, about the things Obama said regarding interactions between the United States and African nations, and about the concerns of the African youth in the conference.

Many of the African youth are wary of trusting the United States and a potential partnership. This is understandable to me because the United States seems like it has a lot of potential for helping Africa but has not tapped into that potential. I have always thought the same thing living here. We have the potential to help so many problems in the world, protecting humanity and promoting economies. We have the potential to help the problems of our own nation, as well.

I generally refuse to engage in politics because I think they are too complicated (I could explain myself here, but it's probably best that you talk to me if you want to know more about this statement). I think that problems are best solved outside of government rule and support, outside of the complexities of political infrastructure and tradition. That being said, I think that Christian missions and humanitarian organizations (when executed well and effectively, of course--that's another discussion for another day) serve as a wonderful way for Americans to make a non-political positive impact on the issues in Africa. Being able to go over to African nations and cultures to work where they see the need and serve in ways they see beneficial is an amazing gift of peace and partnership that we can offer. The United States, as the president mentions, will always be looking out for its own interests as a nation, politically speaking, but if we get involved outside of political infrastructure it is possible to serve the interests of another nation without seeking to serve our own interests.

The president made another important point, though--the success of African nations is beneficial to the United States' interests because a blooming economy in Africa can bring a blooming economy in the United States (and the rest of the world, really). By making peaceful efforts to help African peoples, we are offering our peace as Americans and promoting the good image and intentions of our own country. African nations may be looking for the United States to declare an official, governmental partnership with their own countries, but as the president says at the end of the video, we can seek to empower the future leaders of African nations to step forward and see the impact they can make in their countries. The United States cannot fix Africa's problems, Africa must fix their own problems. The United States can stand beside African nations and see that they can be successful, but African people must rise up and meet the challenges of their own countries.

I feel honored that I was able to stand beside Ethiopians for one short month to enable and encourage some children to find strength and empowerment to lead their country in the future. I want to encourage more American Christians to invest (financially or temporally) in long-term African missions who are taking a grassroots approach in African nations to help them pursue their own interests for the sake of their own country. The American people are represented well in those efforts because it takes place outside of government infrastructure and funding; the true heart of the American people, specifically American Christians, and by association the Gospel, is being represented while Africa is being empowered. America cannot fix the problems in Africa, but Americans can. Europeans can, too. Any educated, moderately wealthy person can. In the same way, too, I believe the American government cannot fix America, but Americans as people personally giving of themselves to other people can fix America. It doesn't have to be about any nation's governmental reputation or interests. It can simply be about the interest of serving others for the sake of serving.

I believe that humility is something that God demonstrated in coming down in human form. He wanted to relate to us and show us in the most concrete way possible that he loves us. We see death as the ultimate end, so God died in order that we would be free from our worst end and stand everlasting in His love. He calls us to show the same humility to one another, bringing love in a concrete way, interceding for other humans in situations of worldly misfortune, in order that those people would experience that love and hopefully do the same for other people.

Future leader of Ethiopia.

Although this seems like it could be put into a humanistic context (ie-societies need selflessness to run smoothly, therefore we are only looking out for our own selfish interests anyway), I think that there doesn't have to be returned humility in order for godly humility to take place. After all, Jesus was mocked and killed by those He came to love. It is not a selfish or glamorous thing to love, but it is death to oneself for the purpose of promoting others. It really is a pretty backwards kind of love. People would think I was awfully crazy if I died just to show someone that I loved him or her. Why would I die simply to convince someone that I love that person? It seems like I could give up on loving that person in order to stay alive. True love is a message worth conveying, and dying to convey that message is exactly what God did for all humanity. The least we can do is relinquish our time living on earth for the good of others in hopes that our message of love is conveyed.

American Food and Reflections

Jan 26(27)

I am here in Washington! Land of pizza, fries, Caesar salad, water fountains, and Spanish instead of Amharic announcements after the English ones! The past few days have been kinda crazy-- I got sick all Monday night after that delicious Ethiopian meal (although thinking about Ethiopian food now makes me nauseated) and Tuesday morning. I slept most of Tuesday in order to have some small bit of energy for the flight. I felt better and better as the flight went on, and I had plenty of time to sleep on the plane, which helped a lot. Traveling has gone really, really smoothly this time around, and I am very thankful for that.

I am a little sad that I was unable to participate in Tuesdays activities (especially because I really wanted to find an Ethiopian doll for my niece), though I rally needed the sleep. I woke up in time to pack up and eat as much dinner as I could before we left for the airport. Although I was extremely weak when I woke up, the more I was awake (and the more Gatorade I drank) the better I felt. I'm pretty sure eating at the Fasika Monday night is what made me sick-- when I smelled the injera and wat that Sam sent home with us in some crates, I felt very nauseated. I guess I will have to stay away from Ethiopian food for a while now. It's different than what I expected-- because I really liked Ethiopian food coming into this trip, I thought by this time on our trip I would be craving Ethiopian food and seriously missing it, but since I got sick (and actually before that) I have not been craving it.

It is very strange to look out and see snow on the ground! The small plots of houses and grass are covered in white-- it's a lot different from Ethiopia. I wonder if there is snow in Indiana...? I am ready to go back home, as I have stated in many past entries, but adjusting back to Taylor life will be difficult (only one more semester of craziness!). I am entering a pretty busy and challenging class load, along with a senior recital, an apartment with new roommates, and I still have a whole lot of reflecting to do on this whole trip. I am really excited to share my experience with friends, family, and acquaintances...anyone who inquires!

I have realized that I take some things in my life for granted. Who would've thought that I would come to that conclusion going to impoverished Africa, right? I live s pretty modest lifestyle, but even as a modest American, I am living materially immodest compared to most Ethiopians, yet most Ethiopians find so much more satisfaction in their lives than most Americans. I think because Americans have more options, we have more opportunity to be unsatisfied. Ethiopians are happy because they have no reason to be unhappy. Their life is all they and their parents and their grandparents have ever known including traditional roles, religion, and other family or village practices. I wonder, though, how different the house kids' perspectives are, especially being exposed to Americans as much as they are. As I have commented before, Project Mercy carries a sub-culture that is different from others living in Yetebon, but I wonder exactly or specifically how different those perspectives are. I'll have to think more on that.

It feels great to be home, but I hope never to forget the lessons I have learned and the people I have met in Ethiopia. God is moving in this world.

City Love

*Preface*
We left Yetebon to travel to the capital where we stayed with the Tregos, American doctors working with the American Embassy in Ethiopia. They cooked us AMAZING comfort food (including Mexican and bagels) and had satellite TV (the same TV that military people have overseas), which allowed our many sports fans (mostly males) to watch the Champoinship NFL games.

Jan 25

Our big day in Addis!

Today was so wonderful-- we woke up to a luxurious breakfast, headed out to go shopping with our wonderful driver Tamrat, went out to eat at the Fasika ( a restaurant that serves traditional food), at which we ate, danced, and laughed the night away. I was really glad to have the shopping experience we did, even though I was really scared of the haggling that was required of us. It worked out really well, though, because Trevor, a finance major and business-minded man, was in my shopping group. He is really good at haggling.

Our driver knew all the right places to go, and he got us to each place safely. I bought gifts for all kinds of people, and our last stop was an amazing coffee shop that sells its coffee to Starbucks. We spent such a long time at the coffee shop because everyone ordered at least three bags of coffee and the most was nine bags. Take the average and multiply that by 17 and you have a LOT of coffee. I'm pretty sure they ran out of their stock of beans because they had to call someone in to bring in kilos and kilos more. We got back to the Tregos' house with only a few minutes to spare before dinner. We left to go to the Fasika with all our American friends, although Dr. Trego and Andrea were not feeling well and decided to stay back.

The people working at the Fasika were very helpful (I think they were used to tourists) and were kind in helping us know what to do. First we ordered drinks, then Sam (Marta's son and good friend of our team) came, then we went out to get our food from a personal buffet they set up outside for us. They explained to us what each thing was and were even a little impressed when we knew what some things were called (mit mita for example, which is a spicy powder added to things to make then spicier...as if the food needed that!). We went back inside to eat, and then the band began to play traditional songs. After they played some songs (Sam explained to us that they were mostly secular songs, although they had set some secular words to a sacred tune in one song), the dancers came out and dances three dances from different regions of Ethiopia.




We had been hoping that, coming from Yetebon, which lies in the Guragi region, that we would get to see the Guragi dance. We did, and the second time they performed it, they got Nathaniel and Eric (two of our American friends) to go dance with them. They also came out into our group on another song and told us to "COME" as they shimmied and swayed. We tried our best to shimmy and sway our rhythmically challenged American bodies, and although I am sure we looked foolish, it was a blast. I had a great time dancing and being able to talk with those around me. The day was a very tiring day, although I am more awake than most tonight as I went to bed early last night.

It was like one big sleepover at the Tregos' house!


I cannot believe that we will be on our way back in less than 24 hours. As I have been saying-- I am ready, but I know it will be a crazy adjustment. I am just starting to feel comfortable with the culture and just starting to get the feel for Addis. I feel almost like we, as Andrea, Aaron, and Nathanial are doing, are only taking a weekend away from Project Mercy and that we will return to our "normal" lives with the house kids in a few days. It won't hit me that I am coming home until I am there, similarly to how I didn't feel like I was going to Ethiopia until I stepped out of the airport here in Addis on January 4th.




Being on this trip has further convinced me that I am ready to step out of the incubator that is Taylor University and into the cold, cold world to serve God in a big new way (wow, so cliche, right?). There is so much outside of Taylor, though, even though Taylor life consumes you when you are there. I am hoping I can be less consumed when I live off-campus next semester. The next big question, though, is what is life after graduation going to look like for me? What is my next step? What will the next 6 months even look like for me? I am learning every single day again and again about patience for the will of the Lord to be done in my life in whatever way God chooses to do that. It is extremely exciting!

Leaving

Jan 25

Walking to church was like torture, like we were walking to a funeral of someone very close to us. The funeral of our experience. I really wish we could have just packed up and left in the morning and not have drawn out the process any longer than that. We went to church, though, and it is always such a blessing to be involved in the Amharic worship services. The people that worship there belong to a spiritually fervent community who truly seeks to praise God and continually seek him. I have loved the moments where I can enter into prayer in my own language and in my own heart while at the same time, those around me are praying and singing in a language foreign to me, yet God hears us all. I have also loved the moments when I am able to pick out the melodies of their songs and hum along (or even sing along if I can recognize some of the words). The church services are very special.

Today, the kids were all writing us goodbye notes during church (or we were writing what they were telling us to write), and after we performed the congregation prayed for . Some of our team members lost their composure completely and wept before the body of people in front of us. When the kids saw us getting emotional, they started to realize what was happening and also began to weep. We left before the service ended. We tried to slip out, but as the last of us were leaving, some of the kids began to follow us with tears streaming down their faces. Up until that point, I had managed to hold back tears in this very emotional situation, but when I saw that even the smallest children knew what was happening and were crying, and then that some of the older kids who had managed to maintain their composure so far were also weeping and following us, that is when I lost it, too.

When I was walking out of the sanctuary , Jiji handed me a note she had written to me, and I was so touched. I didn't want to read until I got back, as not to draw out our goodbye, but when we were walking I back on the road, I turned and saw that she, too, was following us and began to weep. I tried to just keep walking to discourage her from following. Tesfu, one of our littlest guys, started running to catch up with one of our girls who had built a strong bond with him. I had to stop and catch up with Jiji. I welled up with tears and called her name. The only thing I could say to her was, "You weren't supposed to follow!" I saw she was crying, too, and held her hand (Ethiopian sign of friendship) as we walked and wept together silently the whole way back to the compound.

Heidi and Tesfu


When we reached the dining hall and were saying our last goodbyes, I made sure to tell Jiji that she is so beautiful and smart and to never forget it. She hugged me tight and wept more heavily. At that moment, the memory of our first meeting flooded into my brain-- she had told me I looked like her mother. It is such an honor for someone to bestow that kind of comparison upon you, especially such a beautiful, talented girl on the other side of the world with whom you never knew you would connect so deeply. I am pretty sure I learned that her mother had died, and I wanted to just take her home with me. I will never, ever forget her.

Jiji


I had to leave her and the other children that had followed us back who were also crying and lovingly clinging to our team members because I knew it had to end at some point. I went into the commons rooms and as I wept harder than I had the whole trip, I watched out the window as a few girls lingered back, wiping tears and snotty noses and giving big hugs. It was heartbreaking.

Heime


Sara


Bechernet



After lunch the rest of the church returned, mostly made up of the older kids and young adults. I knew I had to say goodbye to Dembelle, Birhanne, Ahsenofi, Lemlem, and Alemnesh. For the first time, I saw Dembelle and Birhanne cry-- that was extremely hard for me. I was very blessed when, after saying goodbye with a hug and an encouragement to practice guitar, Ahsenofi presented me with a bracelet that he had made for me. The boy is definitely one of the coolest kids I have ever met, like if I was 16 again, I definitely would have had a major crush on him. I know he will do so well in the world and hopefully will be given the opportunity to come to the US for college someday. His English is one of the best I head all trip. I pray those things for him.

Teammates and Ashenofi


I am just extremely grateful for the time that we spent loving those kids and them loving us back. Seeing the love of God move through people and relationships like that is really amazingly moving. Most of the kids hardly spoke English, yet strong, presonal bonds were formed through actions of love and care. That is how the ministry at Project Mercy works, though-- there is no outright, direct evangelistic proclamation of the Gospel message, preaching (except very much so at church), or Bible-thumping at Project Mercy. Christ's love is evident through people and their actions and words. That gives God all the glory and the power in moving in that way. With Project Mercy being situated in a Muslim community, showing the love of God creates the relationships and the opportunities for the proclamation of the Gospel. American evangelism could learn a HUGE lesson from these people. It's so beautiful!

Lynne and friends


Snafikish


Salem

Last Hurrah

Jan 24

The past few days have been a little rough because I have tried to limit the time I am spending interacting with the house kids even though my instinct is that I should be taking advantage of any time I can have with them. Yesterday was kind of low key for me. I woke up tired, not really wanting to hike, but I went and hiked with the team up to the Orthodox church on the mountain, and I came back down with a few people from the team while the rest of the team kept going up. The descent was very slow and relaxing, which was perfect for my lethargic self that day. Our guide was very patient with us when we even stopped to talk to some local children and students of ours for about 10 or 15 minutes. I could tell our guide wasn't really thrilled about having to escort us down the mountain, so I thanked him sincerely for his patience when we returned to Project Mercy.





When we got back, I wrote a letter to Joe, read in our textbook, and tried to take a nap, which didn't really work. I was planning to go play with the house kids in the afternoon, but after lunch I ended up practicing skits and music for the Show (our team talent show, which was last night), then I found Ashenofi and gave him a music theory lesson until dinner time. Like I said about teaching guitar, being able to give Ashenofi a lesson in music theory was so rewarding and fun for me. Unfortunately, I will not be able to follow up with him and help him develop a deeper understanding of music since I am leaving tomorrow. Also, since I spent all of that time in the afternoon with Ashenofi, I didn't get to have that last hurrah of a day with the other kids on the compound. In some ways that made saying goodbye a lot harder, but in another sense it made it easier.



The Show ended up being really fun, and I was impressed by all the tasteful humor. No one's feeling were hurt, which was the one fear of the girls on the team in regards to the boys, and people were very considerate and light-hearted. I was so glad we were able to tap into that healthy humor. Many jokes on the trip had been taken too far and people had been offended, but we were able to end our time in Yetebon with a bang. Being able to have the show our last night there was really a blessing and a great time for reflection on some of our memories before we left. It provided the needed closure for our team.

The girls performing our Yetebon rap.


Another wonderful time of closure occurred on Friday night when we were able to have a big bonfire with the house kids and our team. We sang and acted out ridiculous songs, played games (Ethiopian musical chairs mixed with Red Light, Green Light), and closed the night with worship songs. We sang Blessed Be Your Name, which is a song that some of the house kids learned to sing with us. Then, the Ethiopians sang some songs to which we could hum along. We ended up praising God with all our joy and dancing around the fire while singing a wonderful Ethiopian worship song.

It was a beautiful time commending our month that we had been able to spend building relationships with each and every one of those kids. Some of the older students are really showing leadership potential and act as the caretakers of the smaller ones. It really is like one great big family, and we got to be a part of that family for one month, even when we didn't speak the same language or sing the same melodies. The Universal Church is an amazing thing.

Moment of Fulfillment

Jan 22

I feel very privileged that I was finally able to teach Ashenofi some guitar this week after telling him I was going to teach him day after day and then being sick or not able to teach him. It was really rewarding to be able to teach music int his setting, especially after feeling so drained from having to think like an El. Ed. major all the time :) I have noticed myself, in general, though, starting to withdraw myself from the kids more as we are getting closer and closer to leaving. I am definitely ready to go home-- I feel as though our main ministry is over (teaching) and that our time and purpose here has been served.



One thing I have decided I am most grateful for is our team dynamics. I am especially grateful for having Megan as my roommate-- today, I had a moment where I just didn't want to be around people at all, but Megan came in the room and I thanked God for her because she was the one person I felt like I wanted to be around.

Ready

Jan 21

I am thankful to be healthy and able to teach, type, and play as normal! I am praying for my roommate, Megan, now who seems to have contracted whatever 4-day sickness that ailed me. It is terrible to be sick with that stuff, and I am praying for her speedy recovery.

Today was our last day of teaching (1/2 day) and yesterday was our last full day. It was bittersweet because teaching is fun, but teaching here is a little more stressful. I'm glad we only taught the 3rd graders yesterday and not today because our 3rd graders were just so out of control and crazy yesterday. I wrote down all of our students' names since we took pictures of all our students; I really want to remember their names so I can tell stories about them when I get back.

I feel like I am ready to go home, despite how much I really enjoy being here. This was a short-term trip, and I had prepared myself to anticipate a short-term trip. This trip at times has been exhausting, energetic, invigorating, reflective, mournful, solemn, cheerful, celebratory, overwhelming, slow, fast, in-the-moment, flexible, and worshipful. The past few days seem like a whirlwind since I have been sick, we have had days off, classes off, all mixed in with teaching and preparing for American Day. We are going to sing some traditional American songs, talk about American football, American Christianity, American college life, and do some skits for the whole school.

Today we had some unexpected guests from the TOMS factory! Wow, not only was it an exciting surprise to have one of the co-founders of the company and his team members eat lunch with us and talk with us, but it was even more exciting because of how much my family has invested in the company and its mission to bring shoes to the world. (Check out www.tomsshoes.com)it is also awesome because I decided before we left that I was going to use my Toms for my everyday Ethiopia footwear, and the team was fascinated with the fact that I had brought their product here, while at the same time they are looking in to placing a manufacturing plant here to provide not only shoes but also jobs for the community. So cool. It was great to see and get to know the faces behind the company. I will definitely remember this day for a long time.

http://www.tomsshoesblog.com/home-from-ethiopia

Night time around here has been especially meaningful as we visit with the kids during dinner, pray for the needs of Project Mercy, other teams, other countries and our own team after dinner, prepare for whatever each day holds (teaching, homework, American Day, etc) and have quality conversations in bed as we await the next day and become anxious about going home.

I will miss the food here! I look forward to the predictable soup and salad meal each night because it is so delicious. Injera and wat and cabbage and carrots...mmm, I will definitely miss the traditional Ethiopian lunches we eat as well. I have already informed Joe that he will have to learn how to cook Ethiopian food for when I return home. :)







Me drinking my VERY FIRST cup of coffee ever...



I will also miss the mountains and the weather... I have forgotten many times that we are returning to Indiana in January ...

Recovery

Jan 20

Lord, it feels good to have a purpose again!

Sickness Strikes Part I and II

Jan 18

Part I
It is crazy to think that just after my last journal entry I became very sick, and picking up a pen to write was not an option! I remember wanting to journal yesterday, but I did not have the strength to do so. I remember thinking that the only thing I can do when is let my brain wander while I lie in my bed and let my body rest. When the stomach pain and nausea were happening, the only thing my brain could do was pray for endurance and that the pain would go away. It's amazing how simple your prayers become in moments of physical sickness and pain. We serve a God that heals, and I have no doubt that he has helped me through this.

Saturday (Jan 16) after dinner I threw up until I had nothing left. My body could not handle me drinking water or eating anything more than crackers. I became very weak, and breakfast this morning was the first meal I have had in over 24 hours. I knew that when I woke up today without nausea that I should try to eat a meal to strengthen my body. I think it is working. I feel bad that I am missing out on teaching today, but I know that I need this time to recover completely before I put myself out there.

Part II

After reading the textbook (There's No Me Without You by Melissa Faye Green) today, I realized that reading so much narrative makes me think in a narrative. "Kayla stroked her yellow and black striped blanket, but removed her finger for a moment to scratch her sunburned nose." Another more notable connection I made to the text today was after school when I was talking with Tizita, a girl who is in grade 5 or 6, and she shared with me that her father has died and that she has no mother. Our text is about a woman who starts an orphanage and Melissa Faye Green tells bits of many children's stories and interactions with AIDS, poverty, sexual abuse, and other issues. Tizita continued to tell me that she has one sister who is 18 and lives with her uncle. She sees them about 4 times a year when she goes to visit them in Asau (I think?). It was a poignant reminder that each one of the house kids has their own story about their families and their lives outside of Project Mercy. Each child's story is different, but each story could encompass many different things as the children's stories in the textbook do.

Tizta is sometimes withdrawn and seemingly unhappy, and I wonder why. The language barrier can be both a good and bad thing because it keeps two people at a certain distance (which is helpful for not getting attached when we will be leaving soon), but then again it keeps two people at a certain distance. I would love to be able to get to know all the kids' stories, but I feel very sensitive to the amount of time we have left here to invest in those relationships. I am an odd case when it comes to getting to know people because I am really bad at making small talk, and I like to start in on deeper conversation right away. The language barrier, however, often forces me to live in the small talk stage. You can find out a lot through small talk, too, I have come to find. Another wonder in communication is nonverbals-- I have been extremely blessed by wonderful hugs and generous amounts of laughter and smiles. Tizita gave me a great hug after our chat, which made me feel like she understood that I was trying to show her love through this messy getting-to-know-you process.

I am afraid to invest because of the issue of becoming too attached and hurting myself and the people to whom I am attaching myself, but at the same time, I want those deep relationships with the kids here. How do I finish strong and give my all while keeping that in mind?

Mountain Life

Our team at the top of our hike to Fana Falls.




Jan 16

Observations of the Day:

-our tukol smelled really funky after we got back from the hike

-breakfast is delicious, but lunch (always Ethiopian food) is even better, especially after a long hike!

-my legs are very tired

-after the first leg of the hike, my breathing was hardly affected

- I miss Joe and candy almost equally :)


The hike today was a real accomplishment for our team as a whole-- not to mention it was unrealistically beautiful. As I sat and looked out into the mountains, I felt as though I had been plopped into a movie set. It seemed so unreal. The hike presented challenges, leaps of faith (quite literally), and beautiful views. I feel like "beautiful" is such an inadequate adjective. The people that we saw in the mountains were also very beautiful. Their smiles made me smile. They were just as curious of us as we were of them. I also saw two of my students in the mountains, near their homes. It was really cool to be able to see a familiar face up there and to see where our students are coming from. One of our students was caught totally off guard and wouldn't even approach us as I reached out to shake his hand. I bet I would have been overwhelmed, too.

I think one thing the hike further confirmed for me is that the Ethiopian culture is so different. I just keep realizing that through different experiences. The mountains are amazingly, breathtakingly beautiful; also the trails are really difficult to walk and navigate, but it is everyday life for those who live there. I wonder if they realize that the world is not as beautiful as their community on the mountain. I bet is they came to the US they would be overwhelmed by how different our culture is as well. The Ethiopians do not have the farming and agricultural tools and technology that the US has, but if they did, they wouldn't be living the life they are. Their resources on the mountain would probably be destroyed because the amount of land upon which they farm is not proportional to the speed of the farming tools and machines.

Even though I would say that I feel much more comfortable in the Ethiopian culture and living here, I still feel as thought I am a fish out of water. I wonder how I would feel if I were a long-term volunteer-- would I be able to assimilate or would I always be really disconnected from the culture because my experience as an American would cultivate that? I'm guessing it would be a little of both. Coming into this trip I thought it would be easier for me to adapt than it has been.

It could also be because I came in knowing this would be a short time here, and it could also be bcasue I spend most of my time with Americans on this trip. I would love to come here and experience teaching at Project Mercy. Maybe God will lead me here...? Exabier owkal (God knows).

Frustration

Jan 12

Teaching is really frustrating me. It's not that James and I fail as teachers, I just feel that we aren't coming up with creative ways to teach the material we have decided to teach. Also, when we are preparing, it is around other people and we get distracted and end up slacking on our preparations. Neither of us are able to create activities or fun games that are relevant to the content in the books. As I commented yesterday, I feel like I am out of my league and that the methods I have learned are not helping me convey the information we are supposed to be teaching. Also, I am very sensitive to negativity right now, and if I were to engage in conversations going on around me, I would very short and frustrated (and frustrating). Time for bed.

Education Major...?

Jan 11

Today was the first of our teaching days, and I think it went well, although I am finding that I have a hard time being creative with the material we are presenting. I am grateful for the Elementary Ed. majors because they are used to teaching the things we are teaching and have learned about creative methods. I also do not know many songs about the material we are presenting, either, and if I did I would feel more fulfilled, being the Music Ed. major of the group. The content I am used to teaching is so different.

I feel like I have been out of teacher mode, too, for a while now, and today was a warm-up day for me to get back into that persona. I felt pretty discouraged most of the teaching time, but that is simply because my resources are limited and my creativity feels limited as a result. Having the El. Ed. majors share ideas in prep times has been extremely valuable. I know that this experience is an adjustment from teaching children in the States, though, and the language barrier is an extra element of challenge.

Overall, though, today was a good day. I don't think James (my teaching partner) and I had any moments where we ran out of things to do with the kids, but starting off and ending were definitely the hardest moments. Our first group (a class of first graders) was very shy and spoke significantly less English than we anticipated, so we were slow to get off the ground. Our last group (a class of 3rd graders) was a group of three kids (since it was the first day back after Christmas break, attendance was low that day), and we went through our activities much more quickly than with the other classes. Our other 3rd grade class was very rambunctious and less disciplined than the others. I think it was also our biggest group. They ended up splitting into girls following me and boys following James. It is more cultural for girls to be with girls and boys to be with boys. It worked, even though we hadn't planned for that to happen.

I feel like there is no way we will be able to learn all of our students' names by the end of our time here. When we ask for their names, they usually whisper both their first and last names, and we have no idea where each one begins and ends because we are not familiar with Amharic names. When we mumble their names back to them, they are afraid to correct us so they affirm us instead with a humble "yes" even though we know we are not saying it right. It is really hard. I do think teaching will go well, though, and I think they are learning even though they are learning in a completely new style.

All my classes, first through third grade:










Today I realized that even though I love the food here, I really miss being able to go out and buy junkfood. Most of all I am missing candy! One of my housemates has a bag of precious Swedish Fish, which we are rationing. When I come back to the States I am going to buy a bag of Swedish Fish and eat them all in one day. Definitely. I am also going to make a Bosco Stick run at the BP in Upland. I really don't like that I have such an attachment to those things, but it's my culture.



Another thing that happened today was that the memorial service that Randall had informed me that we would be singing at on Tuesday was moved to today! I found out within minutes of us needing to leave, and we quickly picked out two songs and got on the bus. I didn't even have a moment to make myself all nervous by thinking about it too much. :) The name of the game in Ethiopia, though, is FLEX POWDER, which is our imaginary dietary supplement that helps us be flexible while we are here. Ethiopia's concept of time is very different from our Western view of time. I like it so much more most of the time because I generally feel less pressure.

Afterschool, I volunteered to type some teachers' exams. It felt good to be able to help them out in that way because we were able to put our daily exposure to computers in America to use. The challenge was reading their handwriting, understanding what exactly they were trying to ask, and correcting their grammar without changing the meaning/wording of their questions.

Finding time to spend reading my Bible and praying has been really hard because we have been very busy and we are tired from the busyness by the end of the day (I am falling asleep as I write this). There are no excuses, though, because life is always going to be tiring and busy. I am definitely not as busy here ad I am at Taylor or will be in real life. I should be able to carve out time & prioritize here, especially.

Engaging with the Divine

Jan 10



Yesterday, we took a tour of the hospital (pictured above) and went hiking at Crater Lake. The hospital was cool, and we even walked into rooms were patients were staying/recovering. We walked to the KG (kindergarten) compound, and Dr. Tyner gave us the tour. It was really nice. The classrooms have a lot of material resources for the teacher to use with the kids. After that we headed back for some free time and then lunch.

After lunch, we headed out with some of the older house boys and the other volunteers to hike Crater Lake. The drive took about 45 minutes (plus a lot of will power to get the bus up some loose gravel hills), but it was an enjoyable ride. My roommate and I had a really good conversation and got to know each other on a little bit deeper level.

The hike was beautiful, although the interesting thing about it was that we constantly had an entourage of village children following us around and even acting as our guides. We meant to bring a big bag of candy to hand out to them, but we forgot it and felt really bad about forgetting it. They were really helpful to us, especially when a big group of us headed down the path of doom down to the bottom of the crater. We had to hike down (or slide down) a treacherous loose gravel path to get to the bottom. We pulled at branches as we got stuck in the butt and sought to find our footing on large fixed rocks. Reaching the bottom was really neat because we were able to touch the water that was so far from us when we stood at the top of the crater, but it took a really long time to get there. Going back up was significantly less slippery, although one of our girls had a scary spill, and we were all struggling to breathe as dust flew up around us and stuck in our teeth. It was a great challenge, though.







We stopped in Butajira on the way back, and someone picked up a case of Cokes for us to drink at dinner, which was such a treat. After dinner, we had our meeting and then most of the group went star gazing out at the basketball court. That was a genuine time of team bonding where we let loose, joked, and laughed together.

When I came back, I had a great conversation with two of my tukol-mates about some competitive issues that had taken place the day we had all been playing with the house kids on the playground. As a team, we were able to talk about these issues tonight at our team meeting/devos. I prayed a lot about what I was going to share, and I really feel like God led me in preparing for it today.

Today was a great day-- we attended church and were able to see a passionate people worship fully and invite the Spirit of God to dwell there. I felt very comfortable and welcome. Some of the people in the church took the initiative to help translate the sermon for us. I took the opportunity to really pray and worship our most powerful God. The Ethiopians give God the glory and praise He deserves. Prayer is central to their service along with music (worship). They even sing some of their prayers. I love that Jesus, Hallelujah, and Amen are all universal church words. I was able to hear those words spoken in the service, and I even took advantage of the worship times by humming the melodies, clapping the beats, and swaying to the music. I whispered my prayers and spoke "amen" alongside the Ethiopians, which was a powerful experience.

I took time today to play music, pray, write Joe a letter (today is our one year anniversary), and pray and prepare for the team devotional. Today was also a play-study day with the house kids. I learned a few more names today: Snafikish (another extremely beautiful girl), Shobeza, Medihin, Mulubrahan, Armani, Solomon (pictured below with Armani), Werkanesh, and many others. I love being able to continually build up relationships with those kids. I will miss them.



Tonight we met with our prayer partners and teaching partners to prepare our hearts and minds for our full week of teaching this coming week. My prayer is for peace and flexibility.

House Kids

Jan 9

Yesterday was a wonderful day for interacting with the house kids. The morning was teaching prep time and free time for reading, journaling, etc. I took that time (after prepping with James, my teaching partner) to read the textbook, "There's No Me Without You," and study Amharic a little bit. Then after lunch and after our group prep time (and a little nap), I went down to the playground to play and interact with the house kids that were down there. I played volleyball, basketball, and jumped rope. I got to know some of the girls a lot better and a few of the boys. Lemlem, Senite, Sahi (Sun), Jijertu (Jiji), Tesfahonne (Tesfa), Natenael (pictured), Ashenofi (Ashu), Desta, Yerusalem (Yerus), and some others whose names have escaped me. I really connected with two individuals today, specifically Jiji and Ashu.





Jiji is the most beautiful girl I have ever seen. She is slightly hesitant around our team, although on the basketball court she was bossing some younger girls around a little bit. I saw her and another girl arguing in a game of Around the World (or something similar). I got to know her a little bit better when I approached her, asked her name, and told her she has a very beautiful voice. She was the worship leader for the children during the Christmas service, and she sang with the purist tone I have heard since we've been here. All of the children have beautiful voices and are very talented in music.I found out more about Jiji as she asked me about my family and we talked about school, sports, and other things. She was my right hand girl for the afternoon.

Another student who I talked to was Ashu. He is 16 and in 8th grade and speaks very clear English (Jiji is 12 and in grade 6). Ashu played basketball with us, which was my introduction to him, but later he approached me and told me he has always wanted to learn guitar. I was simply ecstatic and told him I would love to teach him sometime. I told him that there is an extra guitar in the dining hall and that we could maybe use it. I hope that none of this seemed like a promise to him so that if it doesn't end up happening he doesn't feel betrayed. I need to check with Randall (one of our team leaders and a Project Mercy employee) if that one on one time between genders would be culturally inappropriate. I also hope that it is possible for me to take time out of our schedule to teach him. We talked more about his family-- he has 2 sisters and 3 brothers, and his family mostly lives in Addis. His sisters are both married, one living in Addis and the other living near Yetebon in Butajira. Some of his siblings attended school at Project Mercy in the past, and he has been here for five years.

After dinner we had our team meeting and we sat and talked for a little while in our tukol. Someone came in and mentioned a star walk, and we ended up gathering as a big group to go lay under the stars. We walked from the main part of the compound, past the grove of trees (I love the word grove by the way...it's just cool! haha), and into a dark, hilly field where we settled on a grassy knoll and scoped out the sky. I talked with Randall on the way out about the possible role of music education could have at Project Mercy because of how talented the children are in music and because of Ashenofi's interest in learning guitar and learning more about music. He said he would have to talk to the headmaster, Ato Getachew, about what that would look like. He said that I might have to teach a lower elementary English class alongside music classes. I would really love to see myself having that kind of role here, if God wills it.

I am feeling much more comfortable with the culture and the people around the compound than I did on the first day. Even though I still feel like I don't know much about the culture, I feel like I am not afraid to engage and learn (at least not as afraid as I was the first day we were here). I'm sure by the end of the trip I will feel much more comfortable, at least on the compound. I feel like the culture outside the compound is much different, and going into town, further away from the compound, it gets even more different. I feel like if I stayed here long-term I would feel more comfortable with those outside cultures than I will in my time here. This is understandable, and I am okay with it.

Christmas in January

Jan 7

Today was another busy day for the Taylor Lighthouse team in Ethiopia. We attended and "performed" for the Christmas morning service; we took a tour of the compound with Deme (Marta and Deme are the founders of Project Mercy) and heard about Project Mercy's history a little bit; we performed a 4pm music and drama program for the house kids (the kids who live at Project Mercy); we walked around the outside of the compound, up to the hospital to find kids who were playing gana (a game played only on Christmas); we came back for dinner and went caroling after our team time together.

After these past few days, I have played more guitar in a small amount of time than I EVER have. It's great practice for me, but sometimes I feel like my guitar skills are lacking. Yesterday, Julie, Heidi, and I tried to find as much time to practice as possible because we knew we should prepare something for the services today. We practiced in the morning before lunch, in the afternoon before dinner, and in the evening after dinner. I also played for one of our dramas since our CD player is in one of the missing bags. We performed it for the morning service, practice before the 4pm service, during the 4pm service, and after dinner. So much more playing than I normally do! It's just crazy to me, but I'm glad for all the opportunities. I was really nervous for the morning service (and a little for the 4pm service), but both went really smoothly. Praise God for that definitely.

Hearing Deme speak today and experiencing the tour with him was really a privilege and a blessing for me. I love the passion he has for Project Mercy and the ministry God is doing through it. It really is amazing to me how clearly God's hand has been in the history of this place and its purposes. God has brought along the right people with the right passions and needs at the right time, and it is truly a blessing for me to see that. I feel really passionate about the ways that Project Mercy is ministering to the community at large by helping provide small business and other job opportunities, growing food for the people of Ethiopia, bringing in children of all backgrounds (mostly poor and rural) to be educated in nice quality facilities, providing skill building opportunities for men and women alike, finding sustainable ways of living to teach to the Ethiopians in the community (tukol design, growing crops, water sources), and empowering the community so that they can take ownership of the things that are happening instead of it being solely a Project Mercy project or idea. This is similar to what my church back home is seeking to do in their community as well, and I hope I can learn some things from this experience to bring back home with me.

This is one of the gardens on the compound in which they grow food not only to feed those who live on the compound but also to feed people outside the compound and sell to people so they can take it to market and make a profit. They also use some non native foods to make the food more marketable, and they use agricultural techniques that are new to the people to teach them how to better grow their own crops.


Talking to children outside of the compound today was a really good thing for me and also and eye-opening experience for me to better understand how the culture views us as white Americans. I got to know a few girls pretty well just from putting myself out there a little bit. I got to know names, grades, and ages, but the most fun part was being able to make fun of them and tease them a little after they made fun of me for not speaking Amharic or knowing what they were saying. I caught on, though, and it was really cool and unique to be able to engage with them in that way. The language barrier works in humor's favor. Some boys came up to me and were teasing me and being rambunctious, and the girls that I was with defended me and told me to ignore them. It was cute, and I felt like that was an indicator of some small trust or personal connection that we were able to develop in that short time of speaking only a few English phrases to one another (name, age, grade). They also taught me a little Amharic (or tried to teach me), which I also thought was cool. After we visited those kids, we came back for dinner.





I am really that we are able to eat with other American volunteers. It is really fun to be able to glean their knowledge of this place, the culture, and the school style. What is even cooler is getting to know their stories and how similar and different they are from our own life stories.

Being able to experience a Christmas service in Amharic was also really neat, especially because the children had taken on the responsibility of planning and participating in the majority of the worship part of the service. They were so cute and such a blessing. They put on a little Christmas pageant-- it was fun to see them do their kid thing, messing up some transitions and stuff. The congregation would laugh just like we would if our American kids were putting on a kids program that had some natural hesitations and missed cues in it. It reminded me that people are people and that children are children no matter where you are in the world. That moment was one where I felt connected to the people, sort of like I was in on the joke for once.

Introductions

Jan 6

I am definitely a big picture person, which is one of the things that brought me here. Now that I am here, however, I should focus on the smaller things because that's where I have been called and that's where I am needed. I am really excited to take each day as is comes now that I am here and beginning to feel more settled. Today, things are feeling much more hopeful. Dembelle and Birhanne took Julie and I around the compound a little bit, which really helped me feel more comfortable being here. They showed us the house kids' dormitory, the gardens, the sports fields, the basket-weaving building, the stables (they were milking a cow-- an unusual sight in Ethiopia because their cows are so malnourished), the bead-making studio. We were privileged to talk with these girls to get to know them and Project Mercy better. We watched Dembelle make a beautiful heart bead, and both she and Birhanne talked to us about their favorite subjects and other school-related things. Birhanne is a teacher and is finishing up her 12th grade studies in Chemistry. I had a harder time understading Dembelle's English, but I believe she has already taken the National exam, not passed, and continues to work at Project Mercy, making beads, working in the kitchen, and teaching other women to makes beads.

Dembelle was very captivating to me. She liked the garden a lot and even picked some of the fruits to show us (not really allowed). Birhanne did most of the talking and even relayed some of what Dembelle was saying to us, but I spent more time with Dembelle and talking with her. They are both very delightful girls, and I am very excited to get to know others as well. I am extremely grateful overall to be here, and I will continue to trust in the Lord's strength and find hope in His purpose for our time here.

Switching Gears

Hello everyone! I am back from my African adventure, and have lived to tell about it, avoiding the Ethiopian Airlines plane that went down the day before our flight.

I thought that since we had very limited communication with anyone back home that it would be cool for you all to read some blogs about my time there. I would love to share stories with you all, and I think writing them out is the best way for me to communicate them to so many people in so many places. A big thanks and shout out to all who wrote me very encouraging notes and emails before I left. It really helped me prepare my heart for a month of service in another country. SO THANK YOU ALL for your support!!!

I wrote in a journal pretty much daily while we there except on the days that I was sick. (More about that later.) Here's my first entry dated January 5, 2010:

The past 2 hours have been extremely overwhelming, especially since the plane landed, we drove through Addis, and then drove about 3-4 hours to get to Project Mercy. Addis was a very intimidating place for me. The store fronts look very different from the vague expectations I held in my mind before we got there. The people dress differently in a large spectrum, some looking more normal to me than others. The language has a beautiful flowing sound to it, but I am overwhelmed by not being ale to understand anyone.

I am generally on who comprehends things through observation, but observing the culture so far has led me to little understanding. I have never interacted with a non-Western culture before and have only spent 10 days in a country that doesn't speak English fluently, so engaging with the culture of Ethiopia is going to have to come in a different way than engaging with other cultures, and I know this is a huge adjustment for me. Hopefully the adjustment can happen quickly as I spend more time exploring the compound and getting to know the children.

When we arrived in the country, I arrived having formed many ideals while preparing for this trip. When I saw Addis ad observed all the towns we passed while driving down to Project Mercy, I felt very hopeless. I had come in thinking that I would be able to connect immediately with the culture and that my lifestyle as one who (compared to other Americans) relies little upon material goods and luxuries would be somewhat similar to the lifestyle of the Ethiopians. When I saw the city and the countryside, my mindset changed because I better understood that I am in a completely different culture, and the only way I can come to feel connected to it is by intentionally engaging with it, as I stated earlier.

Another ideal with which I came in was that I would connect so quickly and easily with the culture and the people that I would want to stay here and serve long-term with Project Mercy. I really respect everything I have learned about the ministry of Project Mercy, and I feel like I could work to promote that ministry, but once we drove through Addi and the small towns and villages, I felt as though I might not be able to help out at all, and that staying here long-term is not even in the picture.

I feel that my presence in Ethiopia (and the presence of Americans/white people in general) is viewed in a fairly negative way, like some are suspicious, and that made me feel very uncomfortable as we drove through the city. We stopped to pick up water in Addis, and there were some older teenagers (maybe in their twenties) who were watching our bus full of ferengis (foreigners) and talking about us. I made eye contact with them and observed them. They saw my large bottle of water and said something. I saw the word "wuha" (the Amharic word for water), and I showed them my bottle in response and mouthed "wuha." They saw me, and with seemingly smug looks on their faces proceeded to mock me/us. I was very confused because I had no idea what they were saying, but whatever it was, they seemed unhappy that we were there.

Throughout our drive to Project Mercy from the airport, people would give a mixture of looks when they saw our bus. Some were happy and waved (mostly children), others gave no response, and others had angry faces and seemed to mutter angry words. One thing that comforts me in all this, though, is that we are working with an Ethiopian missionary organization founded and run by Ethiopians. The last thing I want to promote is the "white Americans coming to save the day" mentality.

I want my heart to be in a place of humility in knowing that I am but a small part of a big thing and that I am here to serve Ethiopia and not to bring along my big ideas (and ideals) to a country that I know hardly anything about and have little connection or experience with. I want to come and help move Ethiopia in a stable direction with what little gifts I can offer. I want to promote what is best for Ethiopia. I want to understand what is best for Ethiopia, what direction the people desire to move, what economic and political things are best for Ethiopia so that I can help promote those things.

Right now, as I serve at Project Mercy teaching English, I believe that (in the context of the world right now) helping children/people in Ethiopia to learn English is one of the primary ways to strengthen a country and help promote its future. I am glad and thankful that I can be a part of an organization that wants to better the country and strengthen the people here. I feel that God has a hand in the work Marta and Deme are doing to aid their country and to promote its role in the world.